Freshies Fight Back
Picture this: You walk into the cafeteria for 12:05 lunch, tray in hand. You survived yet another long sandwich line after a dreaded Circuits 3 reassessment, and your stomach is grumbling. As you scan the tables looking for your friends, you guiltily peer to the back of the Learning Commons. How dare you look at the almighty seniors, sitting on the top tables—their thrones, if you will—as if they’re above everyone else in their bright Crocs and gray sweatsuits or flannel pajama pants. The seniors like to dress as though they no longer care to impress, but they’ve really just let themselves go.
In addition to their beloved pasta bar, which is definitely better than what they will find at their college campuses next year, they will surely miss dissing the freshmen. We are told that we “act like we’ve never set foot in the school before.” How much longer have the upperclassmen been in person? A year? Whoa, time really does “zoom.”
When freshman Aria Balani was asked about the graduating class, she complained that “seniors waste our time during gatherings talking about what has already been said in Evan Jones’s ‘rundowns.’ I think I speak for everyone when I say, I’m just thinking about what to get from the kiosk.” Also, when they spell out their emails into the microphone, I don’t see anyone getting out a pen and paper. If people wanted to join your club, they probably would’ve asked you already.
In the halls they rightfully walk around with their heads held high, proud to be graduating this year. But in reality, it’s a mask to cover up the fact that, despite how much they complain, they’ll miss many aspects of Latin. The foosball table they donated (thanks for that by the way), free periods, sports, and of course the kiosk. So, seniors, enjoy your last few months at Latin. Because next year, you’ll be eye-rolling, slow-moving, iced-coffee-drinking freshmen again.
[A note from the editors: This article was not written or edited with any particular student or subgroup of seniors in mind. In the editing process, a detail was added to the story that made some readers feel targeted. We sincerely regret using such language and have removed it.]
![Photo of Natasha Benjamin](https://readtheforum.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/IMG_8963-480x600.png)
Natasha Benjamin (‘25) is delighted to serve as an opinions editor this year! This is her fourth and final year writing for The Forum, and she loves...
LK • Jan 19, 2022 at 5:16 pm
I love the seniors and this breaks my heart to read because it’s so valid. 1-1
Stacy • Jan 19, 2022 at 3:34 pm
How refreshing to find friendly satire in an environment otherwise hijacked by politics and viruses! High school is supposed to be fun… at least sometimes.
Nathalie Espinoza • Jan 19, 2022 at 12:55 pm
Just gonna leave this here: https://readtheforum.org/18726/satire-humor/beware-the-freshmen-are-everywhere/
Naomi Altman • Jan 19, 2022 at 8:00 am
I love my crocs
charlie gray • Jan 19, 2022 at 11:03 am
preach
stella overmier • Jan 19, 2022 at 7:57 am
the way that the freshman cant even stand in a hallway without blocking it
Tobi Morrow • Jan 18, 2022 at 10:46 pm
We didn’t donate the foosball table.
Evan Jones • Jan 18, 2022 at 9:32 pm
Ok lol